There is great power in expectancy. When you show up at networking events, expect great things to happen. When you walk into the room, brighten it with your smile, extend your hand to everyone, and make your remarks uplifting and positive. You should be seen and heard. Show your strengths. Send positive signals. Demonstrate who you are.
Ask questions about them. Broadcast a few of your most recent accomplishments and ask about theirs. Toot your own horn. Let them toot their horn. Be proud of what you do. Don’t get too carried away with the tooting. Avoid becoming a bore. A bore is a person who has more answers than there are questions. Temperance in all things. You don’t want to come across as an obnoxious braggart. Be interested in what others do. Practice listening.
Never overlook the importance of a warm and friendly handshake. A good handshake can help solidify a new relationship or detract from an otherwise good first impression. If it is well-executed it conveys self-confidence, trust, and a genuine interest in the other party.
Limp handshakes are out. It’s limp and apathetic and very awkward for the other person. It signifies disinterest. Bone-crushing and dead fish handshakes are really lame. You’ll need to avoid the wet handshake (sweaty palms) too. Careful not to go to far the other way and overdo the firmness of a handshake. Make it firm, but not firm enough to cut off blood circulation. You are not trying to bring them to their knees. The best handshakes are firm, brief and accompanied by a warm smile. When holding a cold drink, hold it in your left hand to avoid cold handshakes.
Believe it or not, you are often judged by the quality of the handshake. Greg Stewart, a business professor from the University of Iowa in Iowa City, Iowa says, “”We probably don’t consciously remember a person’s handshake or whether it was good or bad. But the handshake is one of the first nonverbal clues we get about the person’s overall personality, and that impression is what we remember.” Etiquette rules for shaking hands are the same for men and women.
Once at a business networking meeting I encountered a man who only shook the ends of my fingers. No handshake is as uncomfortable as having the ends of your fingers squeezed together and pulled. This was a one-sided handshake. He had total control and I had no grip of any kind. I politely grabbed his hand with my free hand, pulled free and said, “Let’s try that again.” I then extended my hand until the web areas between the thumb and forefinger touched, firmly gripped his hand and offered my name.
A lazy handshake makes you appear disinterested, sort of like a “five-fingered yawn.” If you’re overzealous, however, it’s distracting and annoying. A meaningful handshake usually lasts from 3 to 5 seconds. A release of pressure by either party is a signal that the handshake is over. A good handshake has a nice up and down motion, not a back and forth one.
Gary Pittman says that a good handshake is in the hand of the beholder: if it feels good, it is good. Rarely will you remember a good handshake, but you will remember the bad ones. Handshakes matter.
BONUS Article: The Perfect Handshake: How to Shake Hands Like JFK and Make an Impression
Copyright © 2011 – Larry James. Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. Larry James presents networking seminars nationally and offers Networking coaching; one-on-one or for your Networking Group! Invite Larry James to speak to your group! His latest book is, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”
Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com
NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.
Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://www.AuthorsandSpeakerNetwork.wordpress.com/
Have you ever been to a networking event and got stuck talking with someone who insists on trying to sell you their product or service? Ever try to get away from this boring individual gracefully? Have you wondered how you could easily and painlessly remove yourself from the conversation without hurting their feelings? Did you ever notice how some people seem to spend a lot of time speaking without actually ever saying anything? Do they talk exclusively about themselves and/or their business? Hmmm. Guess everyone has to kiss a few frogs.
Are you spending time and money on networking events without seeing measurable results? Maybe you’re conversing with the wrong networkers. Here are several exit strategies that have worked for me. Hopefully you’re savvier than the average bear when it comes to networking. Feel free to adapt them to your conversation closers repertoire. Do this well, and trust me, they will learn something from you.
I often will walk around with a glass half filled with soda. When I feel cornered, I simply say, “Looks like I need to freshen up my drink, hope you find what you’re look for. Have a great rest-of-the-evening.”
I might cut the conversation short by saying, “Dave, it was nice to meet you. I’m going to move around the room and mingle a bit to meet some other people.”
The most important rule when ending a conversation with someone, whether at a networking event, party or out and about, is to be gracious and kind to your conversation partner. Even if the person was the biggest bore or had the worse halitosis it’s important to not communicate displeasure with them. And, you must clearly end the conversation so you’re partner isn’t wondering if you’re coming back.
