Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Don’t Network With People You Don’t Like!

Filed under: Networking Article,Networking Tip — Larry James @ 6:00 am
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Duh! Seems to me that everyone should know that that is a waste of time. It is inevitable that at some point you will have to spend time with people you don’t like.

The problem with doing your best to work with someone that annoys you is that try as you may, you will NOT be able to change them. You can pretend you like them. That usually shows up in the long run. What else can you do besides being pretentious? You can usually tell when someone is not really being themselves. It is a challenge not worth taking on. Life is to short to waste your time on people you flat do not like. Not everyone is going to be your best friend.

This networking tip is from Daphna Hernandez: “Don’t bother to ‘network’ with people you don’t like. If talking to this person is a chore; if you don’t look forward to calling them, or you can’t wait for your coffee appointment to be over, then you have no business networking with them. Find people you enjoy being with, and develop friendships with them.”

So. . . what do you do? Communicate sincerely. You’ve worked hard to build a reputation for yourself as someone who tries to work things out with others when things seem rough. Hanging out with people you don’t like does not allow you to be true to yourself.

Work on developing the talents and good qualities within yourself so that you can appeal in a new way to other people with whom you will have more in common. Hang around like-minded people. It difficult – if not impossible – to freely express your thoughts with someone that you don’t like.

Could it be that you might be able to warm up relations with a person you dislike merely by smiling, saying hello, and extending a few friendly gestures? Perhaps, however, I’ll bet my bottom dollar that there are plenty other people that you can find that you will like and who will like you if you look for them.

I don’t particularly enjoy being around networkers who are more interested in what they have to say or sell or who are overly aggressive or just plain annoying. When I see someone heading my directions, I go the other way. You can make this change of direction subtle enough by avoiding eye contact, or feigning interest in someone else.

Please don’t misinterpret what I am saying. I believe we should treat others with kindness, compassion and respect even if we don’t like them. Be nice. Never be rude. You can avoid them but don’t ignore them. Stay out of their way. Smile when you feel negative emotions overtaking you in the presence of someone you don’t like. However, nowhere is it written that you have to hang out with them. You can choose to smile and move on.

netHQ

Copyright © 2010 – Larry James. Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. His latest book is, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Visit ” Networking HQ!”

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