Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James

Friday, February 11, 2011

Is Your Hype the Truth?

Filed under: Networking Article — Larry James @ 7:00 am

The honest truth is that before you will ever be able to do business with anyone in your networking circle of friends they will have to like you and trust you. PERIOD!

If there is any hint of unproveable hype, you will blow your chances. Part of your job is to instill confidence in what you do and how you might be able to help others in your network. People have to be able to trust you. Trust is the foundation of a good relationship. Being honest is much easier than constructing fabrication.

In networking. . . keeping your word and telling the truth are paramount! There are many positive benefits of telling the truth. When you tell the truth you don’t have to worry whether what you’re saying now is consistent enough – or too consistent – with what you’ve said in the past.

hypeWhen someone tells you something, you need to know that you’re hearing what they believe to be true. People who tell the truth expect to be believed. When a person attempts to tell a lie or hype their product or services, a number of physio-psychological reactions kick in which are very difficult to hide or suppress, such as nervous ticks, elevated heart rate, increase sweating, tendancy to execute small physical “tells” such as scratching the head or face, averting the eyes, rapid blinking, etc.

You will never receive the full support from others when you stretch the truth, tell a fib, exaggerate, embellish or tell a “little white lie.” You quickly become someone who is dishonest, shady, unreliable, undependable and more.

Some salespeople may engage in self-delusion concerning the value of his or her product or service. Getting rid of the hype and being known for telling the truth you are more persuasive. To be persuasive, you need to be believable. To be believable, you must be truthful.

truthwinsoutHere are a few consequences of not telling the truth:

• Incessant worry of being caught in a lie
• More frequent failures/frustrations in life
• Being distrusted by others
• Lack of self-esteem/self-confidence
• Dysfunctional interpersonal relationships
• Iinability to self-correct
• Stress of many kinds

“There’s an awesome power in personal authenticity and accuracy. When we express ourselves genuinely, we’re choosing freedom and happiness over the prison and pathos of lies. Being present in our truth is more effective, helpful, powerful, safe and loving than living unconsciously in lies.” ~ Keith Varnum (Read: “The Advantages of Living Out Loud“)

I believe that most human beings are mostly truthful, but obviously some people get carried away with the hype and begin to add to parts of the story that are simply not true. They become deceptive. This often occurs with they are not doing well at their job or business and feel the need to make it sound better than it really is. In the long run. . . this never works!

Let’s face it. Some people are habitual liars. Eventually, habitual lying gets you so wound up in a web of dishonesty and deceit that it is difficult to escape into the freedom of honesty again.

Tell the truth to yourself about yourself. Never lie to make yourself look better in the eyes of others. If you have a low self-image and you know it, get help. Not feeling good about yourself can often cause you to stray from the truth.

Telling the truth is part of your character. Telling the truth is the best way to build new relationships, and keep existing ones. If you are to rely on the cooperation and acceptance of your peers, you must always be truthful. Best of all, always telling the truth characterizes you as trustworthy. When people can trust you, you earn their support. You need the support of others to reach your networking goals. Relationships are lost because of deception. In business and in life, the truth is your best friend.

If you are going to evangelize yourself and your business. . . forget the hype! Tell the truth to everyone about everything. Integrity eventually earns you respect and esteem in networking. There is nothing to be gained by settling for anything less than the wisdom of honesty from others and from ourselves.

Remember the story of “The Boy Who Cried Wolf!”?

Nobody believes a liar… even when he is telling the truth!


Copyright © 2011 – Larry James. Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. Larry James presents networking seminars nationally and offers Networking coaching; one-on-one or for your Networking Group! His latest book is, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!” Larry James provides “Networking Coaching” one-on-one and to networking groups!

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1 Comment »

  1. […] learn to effectively communicate this with your “30-second connection.” Make sure your hype is the […]

    Pingback by Testing the Networking Water? It’s Better to Jump in the Deep End! « Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James — Tuesday, November 22, 2011 @ 8:04 am | Reply

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