Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Surround Yourself With “Givers!”

What is a “Giver?” Givers are people who seek out opportunities to help people they respect and appreciate without expecting anything in return. They bring out the best in others. Surrounding yourself with good and positive people will always help lift you up even when you are having a rough time and feel that you can’t do it yourself.

NETGiverORtakerUnfortunately givers are a relatively rare breed. They tilt reciprocity in the other direction, preferring to give more than they get and they don’t keep score. They put the good of others above their own ego.

Takers, on the other hand, have a distinctive signature: they like to get more than they give. It’s all about them. They – nearly always – put their own interests ahead of others’ needs.

“If you’re a giver, then you build quality relationships, and with those relationships you’re exposed to opportunity over the long term,” Adam Grant told Business Insider last year. “You actually increase your own luck so far as you contribute things to other people.”

Networking success doesn’t depend on talent or hard work alone. It also depends on how we interact with people.

While I am in full support of providing value and helping people who are struggling, I fundamentally will not allow people in my network to be exposed to people who are negative and have the potential to bring them down. It’s insidious, and it spreads through the network like wildfire.

I prefer to surround myself with the type of people who give me energy and keep the ones that require energy from me at a safe distance. I love networkers who are energy givers, not takers. They exude energy and you benefit from just being around them. They have your back and cheer you on. They are your network of support, your advocates. These are the people I intend to have a long term, and in many cases lifelong relationship with. The more you surround yourself with these type of people, the more you’ll want to help others. Helping others is what business networking is really all about.

Networking is… using your creative talents to help others achieve their goals as you cultivate a network of people strategically positioned to support you in your goals… expecting nothing in return! ~ Larry James

giveI call the energy takers, emotional vampires. Many are chronic complainers. They can suck the life out of you and a networking meeting like no one else. Deliberately shed those people from your life as quickly as possible. We don’t have time in our lives for those people who don’t believe in us (or themselves), who don’t want to support us, who don’t want to help us grow.

Who should you be adding to your network in the first place? Invite generous people from a wide variety of businesses. Prioritize personality over perceived “usefulness. Think of Santa Claus. He made it because he is a giver! 😉

Do what you can to connect with people who are interesting, and don’t waste time with those who don’t mesh with your personality.

Here is an excerpt from the book “Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success” ~ Over the past three decades, the esteemed psychologist Shalom Schwartz has studied the values and guiding principles that matter to people in different cultures around the world. One of his studies surveyed reasonably representative samples of thousands of adults in Australia, Chile, Finland, France, Germany, Israel, Malaysia, the Netherlands, South Africa, Spain, Sweden, and the United States. He translated his survey into a dozen languages, and asked respondents to rate the importance
of different values. Here are a few examples:

AdamGrant

Info, click book cover!

List 1

• Wealth (money, material possessions)
• Power (dominance, control over others)
• Pleasure (enjoying life)
• Winning (doing better than others)

List 2

• Helpfulness (working for the well-being of others)
• Responsibility (being dependable)
• Social justice (caring for the disadvantaged)
• Compassion (responding to the needs of others)

Takers favor the values in List 1, whereas givers prioritize the values in List 2.

“Surround yourselves with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and the thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see greatness within you, even when you don’t see it yourself.” ~ Author Unknown

If your networking group does not consist mostly of people who are willing to give… I encourage you to find another group who does or start your own group. Starting over is never easy… and it may be worth it. People in your network should leave you more energized. Look for people like that. You will always find that givers ascend from the bottom to the top of the success ladder.

FACT: You’re only as good as who you surround yourself with!

Are you a taker or an awesome “giver?”

BONUS Articles: Give!
Give Praise to Others in Your Network
Give Generously and Graciously
Network to Give…
Give Your Full Attention

netHQCopyright © 2015 – Larry James. Adapted from Larry’s latest book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Networking Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

the-archives2Click for Archives! ~ commentSubscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Thursday, November 7, 2013

How Big is Your Carrot?

You could probably write a book about all the creative things you’ve done to avoid making the decisions you are afraid to make. I believe it all gets back to Commitment #1, “Blueprint Your Life!” – in other words… set some networking goals.

BIGcarrotIf the carrot is big enough, if it looks good when you close your eyes and visualize it, if have a burning passion about it and if it is good for all concerned, then why wouldn’t you want to put yourself “out there” and do what needs to be done? Concentrate on the important and postpone the trivial. The reason things may not be happening for you is that you have yet to understand that until you do what needs to be done, nothing happens.

Accept the responsibility that you make things happen. If you are someone who complains about the way the ball bounces you are most likely the one who dropped it. Make something happen you can be proud of. Make something happen that you can become passionate about – something that serves others and makes you and others feel good. Make something happen that will have people look at you and say, “There goes a person with integrity. She doesn’t just talk about it, she does it.”

Accept responsibility for your own personal development. You can’t count on others for this. Remember, if you always do what you’ve always done, you will always get what you’ve always gotten. When you get the burn to learn, you will begin to earn self-respect, money and much more. Read good books, listen to cassettes, and attend seminars and workshops. Consistently work on yourself. If you don’t, who will?

One sure sign that you are not accepting responsibility is to consistently cast blame on: the weather, the economy, your boss, your customers, your spouse or significant other, your kids and on and on. Elmer G. Leterman said, “A man may fail many times, but he won’t be a failure until he says that someone pushed him.” No one is defeated until he or she starts blaming someone or something else. Want success? Learn that accepting responsibility for your own success and achievement is mandatory not optional.

Life works. It works in direct proportion to the way you work it. It is working just the way you have planned it. If you are saying to yourself, “This is simply not true!” you most likely do not have a written plan. No plan is a plan to have things happen the way they happen. Consider the fact that your life is the way it is because of the choices you have made up to this point.

You must accept responsibility for your choices and for the consequences of your actions. Accept responsibility for the way things are. If you don’t like the way things are, change them. Unless you have a plan for life to be different than it is right now, life will continue to show up the way it always has for you.

Be accountable to yourself. When things work; take the credit. When things don’t work, take the heat.

netHQ

Copyright © 2013 – Larry James. Adapted from Larry’s latest book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Networking Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to “Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James” and receive a fresh networking article or tip every 4th day by e-mail. Click on the “Email Subscription” link on the right under the “search” box. You can unsubscribe anytime!

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Sunday, December 30, 2012

Belief is the Foundation of All Networking Activity

Belief has everything to do with setting your networking goals – belief in your work and in yourself.

You can always sell something you believe in. When you believe in yourself and your abilities, you can sell yourself. Now it’s time to sell yourself on the benefits of setting networking goals and on the benefits of the goals that you set.

networking3“When your belief in the benefits of the goals you set is stronger than your fear and equal to your courage, you can have anything that you decide to have.” ~ Larry James

Important: Never limit your idea of what will be by what has been! Keep looking forward. You will never get to where you are going until you have come from where you have been.

Undefined goals are unreachable. Defining your goals takes some work. First, you have to get past the concern about whether you think you can accomplish them. It is so easy to be too quick to judge what can be done. This kind of concern comes from your history. Now is not the time to recall the things that didn’t work yesterday or last year. Don’t worry about that right now. If you get bogged down with worry, you will never get started. Blueprinting your life requires that you make some changes in the way you are currently doing things.

I’m talking about networking goals. If you are currently in a networking group that does not support you in learning the specifics of business networking… you are probably in the wrong group. Every successful networking group I know has an occasional meeting that is devoted specifically to networking training. One group I know of has one member spend about 5 minutes each week talking to the group about something that they are doing that has contributed to their success. Some groups devote one meeting a month to have an outside speaker skilled in networking techniques to speak for about 20 to 30 minutes specifically about business networking.

One group asked me to speak to their group about networking. They were having a membership drive. I suggested that they invite 2 or 3 other networking groups join in and to allow their members to participate in the meeting. It was a great success and every group recruited additional members for their group and everyone learned more about how to be an effective networker.

Whatever you do, encourage the members in your group to always be setting networking goals with the number one goal to get more training on the specifics of networking. One group I spoke to bought every member a copy of my book, “Ten Commitments of Networking,” however, each member had to earn it by bringing a qualified lead to another member that ended in closed business. This encouraged the person referring the lead to follow-up with the person that gave the lead to and required the person receiving the lead to report back to the referring member – something that is missing in many groups. It’s called accountability!

NETtraining1Reading books and attending networking seminars is another way you can learn more about networking. Go to my Networking Book Store at TenCommitmentsofNetworking.com to see a list of books that I recommend. The newest book I’ve read about networking is, “The NEW Elevator Pitch” by Chris Westfall. I highly recommend it.

Learn more by purusing the over 310 networking articles on this blog. Click here for the articles menu. These articles explain how to make the most of your networking time, what the different types of networking groups do, and how you can use the contacts you meet at networking events to grow your business.

Remember, just showing up each week at a meeting and listening to everyone give their “30-second connection” – sometimes called an elevator speech – is not networking. That’s just another meeting to attend. Networking is more than just attending Chamber of Commerce meetings, going to local business association mixers, trade shows, expos, or joining a group. I’ve been networking since 1972 and I am always on a quest to learn more. Networking has helped me get to where I am today! It’s important to develop your business networking skills, confidence and belief about networking.

In the current economic climate, there’s never been a more important time to become an effective and confident business networker. You will find it much easier to network effectively when you support your belief in networking by being consistent in setting goals that will keep you learning more and more about business networking.

netHQ

Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. Adapted from Larry’s latest book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Networking Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to “Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James” and receive a fresh networking article or tip every 4th day by e-mail. Click on the “Email Subscription” link on the right under the “search” box. You can unsubscribe anytime!

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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Saturday, July 7, 2012

Don’t Join an Easy Crowd

Filed under: Networking Goals,Networking Tip — Larry James @ 7:00 am

“Don’t join an easy crowd. You won’t grow. Go where the expectations and the demands to perform are high.” ~ Jim Rohn

Truer words were never spoken about business networking. They challenged me to begin to think about the benefits of being involved in a networking group.

crowdYIPPEEWhat are the expectations of the group? Individually you will find a multitude of answers. For me “to be in sync” with other members is an expectation that should be right at the top. To be in close relationships with others in the group is a must for the group to have synergy.

Networking groups without a structure of accountability usually do not survive for very long. Training within the group helps members to better work more effectively together. My preference is a group that models their group to hold their members accountable for getting to know each other better and for passing business leads to others in the group. They collectively, constructively support each other. The benefits are many and those who are serious about networking, while helping others – the real purpose of networking – receive the biggest rewards.

In other words, I believe that it is better to belong to a group that has some rules that the leadership of the group hold members accountable for than to show up at at large function where there are no rules and everyone is on their own. I can make an argument for either but that’s not the point. The point is to make wise choices about being in the group that serves others and you exceedingly well. A little bit of both is not a bad thing as long as you use your time wisely.

higherMy experience has been that a large percentage of people who wander around from group to group are the ones who appear to be desperate to get some new business fast. Effective networking doesn’t usually happen fast. Why? Because networking is really about building long-lasting business relationships and that takes time.

Look for a group where the rules cause you to be a little uncomfortable – that force you to be accountable for your actions within the group. Networking is a collaborative effort. Rules are present to help you grow. Groups like this differ from traditional networking groups in that they provide personal support, training, as well as business networking. Look for a group where the group dynamic is positive. These groups are instrumental in building your business more effectively.

Rules might include a requirement that members bring a business lead to each meeting or attendance requirements – a rescinded membership for not attending enough meetings. Some networking groups – usually large events function with very few, if any, rules at all, and just allow individuals to attend and network at will.

A structured environment for the development and exchange of quality business referrals works very well. The commitment to building these referral sources is reinforced by weekly attendance by members. Active members attend consistently. These groups also assist you in developing a network of professionals who will get to know you and refer business back and forth between members. Basic rules are created to help ensure the success of you and the group.

“The only way we can find out what we’re capable of doing is to take on more and more until we fail. And then get up and do it again. Get up laughing from every setback.” ~ Wes Hopper

Give more and expect less is a good personal rule to live by when networking.

Please don’t join an easy crowd of networkers. Find a group that will cause you to stretch – to get outside of the box! Or set your own networking goals that make you s-t-r-e-t-c-h. That’s how you will most likely have the most success!

“Network with accountability. Say what you mean, mean what you say and do what you say you are going to do.” ~ Dawn Billings

netHQ

Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. Adapted from Larry’s latest book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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Saturday, November 27, 2010

Networking GOALS!

Filed under: Networking Goals,Networking Video — Larry James @ 7:00 am
Tags:

My friend, Larry Winget, knows about setting goals. Enjoy.

http://smartercomics.com/ShutUp

netHQ

Copyright © 2010 – Larry Winget. Larry Winget, also known as The Pitbull of Personal Development®, is a five-time New York Times/Wall Street Journal bestselling author and a member of the International Speaker Hall of Fame. He has starred in his own television series and appeared in national TV commercials. Winget is a regular contributor on many news shows on the topics of money, personal success, and business. Confrontational in his style, direct in his approach, and irritating in his manner, he nonetheless generates laughter while bringing home his powerful points. Love him or hate him, you’ll find his way of looking at things a catalyst for change in your life. Visit Larry’s Website!.

Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. His latest book is, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

letsbefriends2

Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://www.AuthorsandSpeakerNetwork.wordpress.com/

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