Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James

Monday, March 3, 2014

Ask For What You Want!

“When you want something from someone else, ask. You’ll be OK if they say no. Asking is being true to yourself.” ~ Cherry Hartman

Ask for what you want. Winners are skilled at getting help. Successful people are askers. They develop a network of support. They are not afraid to learn from the experts. Their support system consists of people in the community and even throughout the country that make themselves available to them when needed. They regularly communicate with other business professionals who are experts in their fields of endeavor. They are not subtle or indirect. They speak clearly about their needs and ask.

Don’t drop casual hints. People cannot read your mind. It is a mistake to assume that people know what you want. This kind of assumption stymies possibility. Be adventurous in expressing your needs. Ask. If you don’t ask, you become a victim of your own inability to communicate. This is not a guessing game. People appreciate honest candor. If you don’t ask for what you want you haven’t earned the right to have it.

JustAskMost people are not willing to admit they need help, so they withhold. They resist asking for assistance and in the process refuse others the opportunity to contribute to them. Withholding causes one of life’s biggest and most damaging problems. Keeping things to yourself is not healthy for you or anyone else. Share your needs. Ask for assistance. Can you see that withholding doesn’t work?

On the other hand, there is a danger in constantly presenting yourself as someone who is always in a position of needing something or of expressing yourself as needy. We are not talking about being a whiner. We are not talking about being a complainer. Whiners and complainers come across as weak people who are needy.

Sharp people can spot them a mile away. We are talking about always asking and never doing. It is one thing to ask for someone’s assistance and another to never do anything with their advice! If you are interested in knowing and doing. . . ask. Some people ask only to call attention to themselves. Avoid being one of those people. Ask for assistance when you need it and ask people who are in a position to assist you. Then do something with what you have learned.

At the risk of sounding sexist, it’s been my observation that men particularly have a problem in this area – women too, but mostly men. Many men were brought up to believe that we have to do it all by ourselves. We have to be totally responsible. If we ask for help, it’s a sign of weakness. Hogwash! I personally believe it to be a sign of strength. It takes courage to admit you don’t know and ask for help. Asking is accepting responsibility for not knowing and trusting yourself to be courageous enough to ask for someone’s help.

Successful people love to help others. Ask them for help. It is one of the most sincere compliments you can give. Asking a successful person for assistance is an acknowledgement of their expertise, wisdom, knowledge and experience. Asking successful people for advice allows them to contribute to you. It is one of the keys to success. It has been my experience that the more successful a person is, the more he or she is willing to share their good fortune with others. It is a life skill worth duplicating. Capitalize on their generosity. Caution: Be aware of and respect their time limitations. Know what you want to ask for, ask for it, say, “thank you,” ask if there is anything that you can do for them and move on.

Although this is great advice… it is important to be known for “giving” referrals, business info, ideas, etc., before asking for something from anyone else in your network! All “ask” and no “give” will not work!

netHQ

Copyright © 2014 – Larry James. Adapted from Larry’s latest book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Networking Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to “Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James” and receive a fresh networking article or tip every 4th day by e-mail. Click on the “Email Subscription” link on the right under the “search” box. You can unsubscribe anytime!

commentSubscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

letsbefriends2

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Monday, June 24, 2013

Designed by Apple in California…

May I have your complete attention for a few moments?

Apple’s New Ad Campaign is Focusing on Branding and Enriching Lives! I believe that the text from their ad should inspire everyone who networks.

Does what you do or does the service or product you offer enrich others?

If so, how?

Read the question again: Does what you do or does the service or product you offer enrich others?

If so, how?

If you are stumbling over all the answers that are swirling in your head about that question, you are probably not alone. We all think we know what is best – about our product or service – for our customers and clients. But do we really?

Please take time to really listen and watch the video below. Listen carefully to the words! You may want to watch it several times.

Apple

Text from another Apple Commercial.

Does what you do enrich the lives of others? How you speak about your business and about what it does to enrich the lives of others will certainly clarify the distinction you need to be aware of between success and failure. Investing in the time it takes to carefully articulate the intention of what you do when you speak to others – and to those in your network – about your business, could be the breakthrough you have long awaited.

You can speak more clearly about that which you fervently believe. There is a sense of passion about how you or your product or service can help others. People can hear the conviction in your voice.

I believe in using your influence to enrich the lives of others. When you do this in a constructive and helpful way more people will want what you have. Not just your product or service, “but what you have;” that healthy attitude, that smile that projects the confidence that comes from helping others.

I hope you know by now that that is exactly what business networking is all about… helping others.

Networking is… using your creative talents to help others achieve their goals as you cultivate a network of people strategically positioned to support you in your goals. . . expecting nothing in return! ~ Larry James

netHQ

Copyright © 2013 – Larry James. Adapted from Larry’s latest book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Networking Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to “Networking HQ BLOG with Larry James” and receive a fresh networking article or tip every 4th day by e-mail. Click on the “Email Subscription” link on the right under the “search” box. You can unsubscribe anytime!

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

letsbefriends2

Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://www.AuthorsandSpeakerNetwork.wordpress.com/

Monday, October 5, 2009

Ask For What You Want!

Filed under: Networking,Networking Article — Larry James @ 7:00 am
Tags: , , , , ,

Networkers are skilled at getting help!

Successful people are askers. They develop a network of support. They are not afraid to learn from the experts. Their support system consists of people in the community and even throughout the country who make themselves available to them when needed. They regularly communicate with other business professionals who are experts in their fields of endeavor. They are not subtle or indirect. They speak clearly about their needs and ask.

Don’t drop casual hints. People cannot read your mind. It is a mistake to assume that people know what you want. This kind of assumption stymies possibility. Be adventurous in expressing your needs. Ask! If you don’t ask, you become a victim of your own inability to communicate. This is not a guessing game.

ask2On the other hand, there is a danger in constantly presenting yourself as someone who is always in a position of needing something or of expressing yourself as needy. We are not talking about being a whiner. We are not talking about being a complainer. Whiners and complainers come across as weak people who are needy. Sharp people can spot them a mile away. We are talking about always asking and never doing.

“Those who won’t ask for advice most need it!” – Malcolm Forbes

It is one thing to ask for someone’s assistance and another to never do anything with their advice. If you are interested in knowing and doing. . . ask. Some people ask only to call attention to themselves. Avoid being one of those people. Ask for assistance when you need it and ask people who are in a position to assist you. Then do something with what you have learned.

Successful people love to help others. Ask them for help. That is what a network of support is for. It is one of the most sincere compliments you can give. Asking a successful person for assistance is an acknowledgement of their expertise, wisdom, knowledge and experience! Asking successful people for advice allows them to contribute to you. It is one of the keys to success.

It has been my experience that the more successful a person is, the more he or she is willing to share their good fortune with others. It is a life skill worth duplicating. Capitalize on their generosity. Caution: Be aware of and respect their time limitations. Know what you want to ask for, ask for it, say “thank you,” ask if there is anything that you can do for them and move on.

“People who ask confidently get more than those who are hesitant and uncertain. When you’ve figured out what you want to ask for, do it with certainty, boldness and confidence.” ~ Jack Canfield

When you have taken the time to ask for what you want and the other person doesn’t have the answer, ask for a referral to someone who does. Perseverance is the key. If you want something, find someone who knows about what you want and ask them. Talk to business people, or people who are successful in their industry. Most successful people are well connected. They know where to get the answers.

There are more people in the world committed to giving than you would imagine. When you are ready for assistance, it usually shows up. It’s like a law; a law called receptivity. It’s like magic! You will find yourself attracting people who have what you need. You attract who you are. If you are someone who is a warm, caring, sharing person, you will attract warm, caring, sharing people.

Let others in your network know exactly the kind of business leads you need. Create an effective “30-Second connection.” But, before you ask for business, create a relationship! Establish rapport. Networking is about creating close, personal, business relationships.

netHQ

Copyright © 2009 – Larry James. Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. He presents networking seminars nationally and “Networking” coaching by telephone or one-on-one. His latest book is, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Visit Larry’s “Networking HQ” Website; articles, tips, networking books and more!

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

Add Larry James to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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